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I originally started my transition in July of 1985, rushing in headlong because I was so desperate to make up for all the years I'd wasted trying to be a man. I had no plan and no money, essentially skipped therapy because the first therapist was so negative. I started female hormones with minimal supervision, didn't get labwork done, went to an unskilled electrologist, and rushed into living full-time as a woman. I reiterate: I was desperate to make up for all the time I'd wasted trying to live as a man. When society greeted me with ridicule, rancor and bigotry, I used drugs to deal with my angst and the resentment that despite my college training I had to work as a prostitute. Prostitution and heroin were choices, to whatever extent they were truly free choices, and eventually it all fell apart. I detransitioned and then I completely descended into heroin, PCP madness and near-death scrapes. The second time I did it all properly. January 1978 - began crossdressing as a fetish only January 1984 - got married partly in the belief it would "cure" me April 1984 - read Feinbloom's Transvestites & Transsexuals: Mixed Views August 1984 - first trip in public en femme to a transgender bar October 1984 - second trip in public en femme March 1985 - re-read Feinbloom and strongly identified with TSs this time May 1985 - left marriage July 1985 - started hormones and electrolysis; discrimination and ridicule began December 1985 - complete Computer Science AA degree with Honors December 1985 - fired from SF housecleaning job when I asked to work as a women January 1986 - fulltime prostitution, beginning of hardcore addiction w/IV drug abuse September 1986 - finally detransitioned - addiction deepened November 1986 - tested positive for HIV, likely due to IV drug abuse December 1986 - spiral downward starts with PCP blackout, mutilation & arrest August 1988 - drug rehab after jail, hopeless addiction and numerous heroin overdoses September 1988 - transsexual desire return strongly after six weeks sober October 1988 - need to transition intensified, suicide considered November 1988 - resumed female hormones December 1988 - resumed thermolysis May 1989 - hired as "Chris" and started galvanic electrolysis September 1989 - electrolysis completed December 1989 - began living and working full time as Christine June 1990 - breast and cheek implants, went blonde March 1991 - chemical peel to removed thermolysis scars May 1991 - orchiectomy after labs revealed liver trouble September 1991 - cleared for SRS by therapist Early 1992 - turned down with finality for SRS due to HIV August 1992 - relapsed after four years sober January 1993 - sober again for seven months, then began drinking March 1997 - clean and sober again Spring 1998 - diagnosed with hepatitis-C (HCV) September 2001 - found Dr. Toby Meltzer September 2001 - sent off deposit, health info and labs to Dr. Meltzer October 2002 - SRS completed 10/31/2002 by Dr. Meltzer November 2002 - filed paperwork to legally change name and gender February 2003 - judge signs order changing my legal sex March 2003 - labiaplasty puts finishing touches on new genitalia March 2003 - facial laser resurfacing to remove residual thermolysis damage October 2003 - birth certificate amended to Female and Christine May 2004 - successfully completed HCV chemotherapy - cured! October 2005 - FFS (facial feminization surgery) by Dr. Toby Meltzer June 2008 - full facelift by Dr. Toby Meltzer to finish off my FFS May 2011 - published transition and recovery memoir started in fall 1988 |